|
4 secrets of sexy people
Margot Carmichael Lester, Match.com
 On
the surface, sexy seems elusive, impossible to quantify. To play
out this hunch, I asked people all over the country to tell me
what "sexy" meant to them. And I found something interesting.
Turns out, "sexy" is a kooky amalgam of easily defined
elements. So let's break down the semi-universally agreed upon
elements of sex appeal:
1. Looks: We're all visually stimulated, so naturally "sexy"
involves some level of physical attraction. But what attracts
one person may repel another. For Mihail, an entrepreneur from
the Bay Area, "Sexy means eyes that pierce yours, lips that
exude sexuality, clothes that hang off you just right." For
Flora, a Seattle-based writer, "Sexy is a couple of tattoos
and a motorcycle." For me, it's great hair and mischievous
eyes.
2. Smarts: Brainpower gets high marks even out of the classroom.
"When a woman's intellect matches up with mine — or
even slightly exceeds it — it's very sexy," says Bob,
a Hartford banker. "It makes her a little mysterious. I could
really learn something from her. And you know how guys are always
hot for teacher." Darren, a Long Island-based college student,
boils it down further. "Someone who has nothing particularly
interesting to say is simply not sexy." Personally, I find
intellectual stimulation to be very exciting.
3. Laughs: Everybody likes to laugh, especially women. Studies
show that chicks dig guys who possess good senses of humor. No
one's really sure why. But hang on, fellas. Don't go signing up
for that stand-up comedy workshop down at the community college
just yet. "It's not about a routine or shtick," says
Lisa, a graduate student at the University of Chicago. "That
backfires most of the time because it's so rehearsed. I'm talking
about honest humor — whether it's dry Brit wit or outrageous
physical comedy." If a guy can't get a laugh from me, he's
probably not going to get anything else either.
4. Self-confidence: Perhaps the ne plus ultra of that je ne sais
quoi. "Confidence is being okay with who you are, accepting
of yourself," says Chad, a L.A. actor. "A confident
person knows where he is, who he is and what he wants. And he's
doing what it takes to get it." For me, confidence is knowing
your own power, gifts and flaws and embracing them without apology
or arrogance.
On its own, any of these attributes might be enough to get you
interested in someone. But the real magic happens when you meet
someone with all of these elements in just the right proportions.
What makes sexy different for each of us, however, is our unique
blend of the individual elements. We each tailor the recipe to
our own tastes. You might put a higher value on humor than looks,
which is why the person your friend finds dead sexy doesn't elicit
the same response from you.
Lynne, a PR professional from Austin, explains it this way: "It's
like working in chemistry class. You get 'just a little bit of
this', add 'just enough of that' and then 'just the right amount
of the last ingredient,' and it goes BOOSH!"
|
